What Have I Done Mom?

I know I’m not who you want me to be
I’m not the perfect little girl
You’ve always wanted to see
So you pushed me away
Gave me emptiness to fill my grave
You’d send me to my room
When I just wanted to be around
What have I done mom?
You treated me like a disease
All I tried to do was please
Then one day I grew up
Became an adult of my own
I left home with battle scars
Some given out by you
Yet I flourished and grew
What have I done mom?
I just wanted a mom
I just wanted to be loved
I only wanted to be an image of you
An image I created within my minds eye
during all those nights I’d cry
So I built a wall so high
Even the best soldier couldn’t climb
I hated you inside my head and in my rhythms
Then one day I grew more
Eventually I let your misery go
I continued to grow
Now you want me back
You feel guilt from all those years
Now you’re the one crying the tears
I no longer have a room in my life for you
The empty hole you left in my heart
Is covered in a scar, nothing new
Even with all this said
Inside I’m not completely dead
I’ll give you what you couldn’t give to me
I still love you

About JustOrdinary

Hello my name is Rachel…around here I’m best known as Just Ordinary. I created this blog page to share pieces of my life with you, the reader, also to share my projects, and writings. This blog page I have created is a collection of realty and fiction. Not everything I write pertains to me or my life.

Posted on Monday, August 3, 2009, in personal, Poetry, prose, thoughts, writing and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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