Daily Archives: Thursday, July 12, 2007
Valan was not eager to finish but he did in a grief-stricken tone.
“She whimpered as she whispered to me.”
“I wanted to tell you that we were going to have a child.”
“A tear began to stream down her left cheek as I held her in my arms there in the wet grass.”
“Save the child before you save me Valan…” with that she drifted off. I sat there holding her tight focusing on her breaths. I wept over her until the ambulance showed up.”
Tears started to fill my eyes as he told me the horrible tale. The only thing you could hear in the room at this time was the machine hooked up to Martha.
He turned so that his eyes landed on Martha.
“The baby never made it. She wasn’t very far along. The trauma to her body was too much. There was no hope of saving the baby. They rushed her here to Park View Hospital in hopes that surgery would save her life.”
I had to wipe the tears from my face as I gazed upon him standing there telling me of the accident.
“They were able to stop the eternal bleeding. The doctors worked miracles on repairing her abdomen. Unfortunately the trauma to the head was too much for Martha. The doctors done all they could do for her but she never awoke.”
He shook his head slowly as he stared at her lifeless body in the bed.
“They wanted me to decide what it was I wanted to do. Did I want to have her on life support or let her die? It was the toughest decision I had to make Laney.”
Turning slowly to face me our eyes locked.
“I couldn’t let her die. I had to give her the chance to come back to me. I had decided to put her on life support.”
I stood up and slowly walked to his side. I placed my hand on his back.
“You done what any loving husband would have done Valan. Maybe Martha will pull through and wake up soon for you.”
We stood in that room side by side just looking at her lie there in the bed. You could feel the sadness fill the room.
It was hard for him that day to tell me the story of the accident. It was hard for me to hear it myself. Such a tragedy it was. As the years passed I secretly wished that he would just let her go to the other side. I wanted to make a life with him but knew I couldn’t if she lingered. I could not bring myself to tell him what I secretly wanted until a blessing came along for me.
For many years I went with him to the hospital. I helped move her on her side. I helped give her sponge baths. I devoted myself to Valan, and I knew in order to love him I had to accept my part in taking care of Martha. I often would sit at her side and wonder to myself what if she wakes up? Where will that leave things if that was to happen?
A few years after Valan and I had become an item he told me that if she woke up he would not leave me. He said he loved me and he only loved a memory of her. He always said that she would never be the same if she did wake up. The doctors informed him of that from the beginning. I always doubted that he would just leave her if she woke up. All the stories he shared with me about her and the life they lived. How could he leave her if she woke up? Selfishly I had hoped that would not be a bridge we’d cross.
To be continued….