Christmas spirit being sucked out of me….
Three days until Christmas is here…
We got bad news from my husband’s workplace. They are telling people lay offs might have to come along.
This is NOT good for our family, and probably many others. We are expecting our second child now too. It took us over two years to get pregnant. The doctors determined I would be permanently disabled a year ago. The health insurance he has is a very important necessity. We would go bankrupt without it!
I had to have back surgery in September of 2005 and I was fortunate to have health insurance. I only had to pay an estimate of $1,300.00. The total bill was over $30,000.00!
Now I am faced with the problem that after I have the baby I will need another MRI done. My neurologist is worried that I have another tumor on my left side that will need removed. That means another back surgery! That means another $30,000.00 bill. That is rather scary when you think about not having health insurance to help you pay for that.
I wish the damn company my husbands works for would have waited until after Christmas to give this news out. It makes Christmas hard to celebrate when you are consumed by worries about your finances. They tell you around a holiday that has become so damn commercialized. I know Christmas is not about gifts but you see I LOVE to give! I would rather give then receive! Been that way my whole life and I don’t want to change.
If this turns out bad for us I will have to change. I will be forced to change. I will have to stop donating to the Children’s Cancer Research, the Disabled Veterans, the local food pantry, and so many more. That really pisses me off!
When I walk by a person standing out with a donation can, I think twice about giving now. I worry about needing that money very soon for my own medical bills and medicines. I don’t want to be like that! I don’t want to feel like I can’t donate to these people.
I was raised in a VERY poor home and I don’t want to live like that again either. I don’t want to worry about my next meal. I don’t want to worry about not being able to go to the doctor because I can’t afford to pay for it. I lived that life for 23 years.
I hope my prayer is answered this Christmas. Not only for me but also for many families in America who face this same situation or those who are poor and needy already.
Why doesn’t the United States Government care about its people?