If I Die on the Surgery Table tomorrow morn….

Well I want to say thank you to all that have commented here at my BLOG and I greatly appreciate the good wishes, prayers, and thoughts. I got results from my doctor and it wasn’t good.

I found out that I have gall bladder disease. Apparently my gall bladder has not worked for some time and this is some of the reasoning for my pain. I have been told that it must come out immediately.

I go into surgery tomorrow morning at 9:30am for prep and surgery begins at 11:00am. It will be an out patient procedure if everything goes right. Pray everything goes right for me please. I am a bit worried that something might happen when I get on that table.

I’ve investigated my surgeon and the hospital stats. They are great so I have no worries about them making a mistake during the procedure. However, I am worried that luck really is not on my side when it comes to health issues with me. They thought my back surgery was a simple fluid filled cyst. It ended up being a tumor instead when they finally got in there. I am worried something along those lines might happen again. That is one reason I am writing this post now.

If something does goes wrong during this procedure I want something out there that states what I want done.

IF I should die on the table for some odd reason I want things to be clear so my family will have it a little easier, I HOPE TO GOD THAT DOESN’T HAPPEN TOMORROW! In case though this needs to be posted. You never know when something can go wrong.

I want a funeral to be held in my hometown for my family to have a chance to grieve and say good-bye. Afterwards I want to be cremated. My husband can do whatever he wishes with my ashes. I want my wedding dress to be given to my oldest daughter. I want my wedding band to be given to my youngest daughter. My husband can donate my clothing to the local CAP agency when he feels the time is right if I should die during surgery. I want to be buried in my red and black pantsuit I bought from JC Penney.

What if I have to be put on life support? This is a hard subject to address. If there were a chance I could come out and not be a vegetable I would want them to give me life support in hopes I’d wake up. If by chance I would not be able to interact with my family then I don’t want to be given life support. My husband can make the final decision on whether to keep me on life support or not. I trust him that much. His decision will be final in the event this happens. No one else will have say.

I have some music I want played at the funeral if I were to die during surgery. I’ll list them here and my husband can decide the order they play them. I don’t want my entire funeral and showing to be about crying. I want my family to think of funny memories and not just sad good-byes. Some of these songs will help. I have picked a few to allow them to weep like they will want to as well.

1. The Rose- Conway Twitty
2. Through The Years- Kenny Rogers
3. Little Wonders- Rob Thomas
4. Secret Smile- Semi Sonic
5. Chasing Cars- Snow Patrol
6. Epiphany- Staind

All of those songs have some special connection to me. My family and friends there will get it when they hear each tune.

Now it is time to write a special message for everyone who cared about me and loved me.

Short and sweet.

Each of you has had a special place in the life I’ve lived. Each of you has had some part of making me the woman I became. I love you all dearly in the good and the bad. Don’t weep for me long. I’m in a better place where my worries are over and life’s pain is finally over. I’ve gone to join my dad, my beloved aunt Eve, and other family members I’ve loved and lost while living. Those of you who worry about forgiveness from me, I have forgiven you so be at peace, I am. I hope those who I need to ask forgiveness from have forgiven me the same. I love you and it is hard to say good-bye but life must go on for you all. That is what I want. I want life to go on for you and I want you all to live it to the fullest. Live it, as it was your last day. I’ve always loved you and I will continue to love you from heaven. Oh and don’t let Jeff get away with not paying me the five bucks he owes me from a bet we made. (Smiles) Rest easy family and friends, I’m in God’s arms now. – Rachel Ann

Lets hope the surgery goes on without anything going wrong. Lets hope these things won’t have to be read out loud for many years into the future. Lets pray God holds the surgeons hands tomorrow and I awake to live life again.

Thank you all so much for reading my posts. Thank you all for your thoughtful comments and prayers. It is nice to know the good people visited my page here at word press and hopefully when the surgery is over and I heal fully I’m able to continue writing posts for you here. I’m sure things will be fine tomorrow. Wish me luck.

Just Ordinary- Rachel